Never Pretend: Do the Best You Can

Never Pretend: Do the Best You Can

Never be who you are not

Never Pretend

Never pretend!
You can’t hold a false impression for too long.
What makes you think you will not get tired someday of trying to impress people by being who you are not?
You have a true identity.
There is something that makes you tick.
You have your true passions and abilities.
Certain things distinguish you from others and make you exceptional.
Why focus on the things that trigger others.
Why try to appear nicer than you really are so that people can tolerate you.
Why not rather become the best of yourself so that people can celebrate you.
Nobody else can be a better you than you, that is why it is best to remain original.
Why pretend, when you are better at being yourself than anybody else can?
You are king when it comes to being you.
You have your ideals and your dreams. Stick to them. Pursue them!
Develop yourself!
Do the best you can.
Work towards achieving your own goals.
Keep dreaming your own dreams and carving your own path.
Align with those that share your values and tag along with those that encourage your dreams.
Certain people love you for who you are and enjoy you for being yourself.
You will never need to pretend around such people. Identify them and use their encouragement as leverage.
Why force yourself to stay in an uninspiring environment, only to please someone who feels you are no good?
Why plead for admiration and borrow to impress, in an environment where you are considered worthless?
It is only with time that you will either end up being a complete duplicate of someone else, or get discarded as trash.
Rather than pretend; do the best you can!

Use What You Have

Do The Best You Can

You have your own unique perspectives, passions and abilities.
You will definitely interpret life in your own unique way.
Rather than pretend; do the best you can.
If someone identifies you for being you, it is almost impossible for such a person to get fed up of you.
If you are loved for being yourself, being the best of yourself will fetch you even more love.
That way, you will keep getting happier and more fulfilled with the company you have and the satisfaction you enjoy.
Don’t pretend to be accepted. Rejoice when you are rejected for being yourself. Keep being yourself until you are identified by those that love you for who you are.
Those who love you for who you are will sincerely inspire you and bring out the best in you.
Why pretend when you have better chances at doing the best you can?
You can only learn to do better when you have at least done your best.

When you know better, you'll do better

Do The Best You Can

What makes you believe that it is only in that little space where you find yourself right now, that you can find endorsement, approval and encouragement?
If nobody appreciates you right there, there may just be some better place.
Have you not realized that your conversations may be more interesting with certain people than others?
Has it not occurred to you that moments shared with certain people gives you more fulfillment than those shared with certain other people?
The same way some people appear more interesting and relevant to you, people’s perspective of you vary from person to person.
Life is more fun when it’s shared with people that enjoy you.
You can’t find out who truly enjoys you for being yourself, if you have never picked up the courage to be yourself.
Games are enjoyed in the playing.
If life is a game, would you deprive yourself the fun of playing for fear of losing?
If you find your right game, you will definitely find people to play with, and whether you win or lose, you will be happy.
Life’s trophy may not necessarily be material possessions or money, but the joy, satisfaction and fulfillment that comes from sharing happy moments with those that appreciate you.
In life, you must dare to explore new grounds, because that is the key to unlock your long awaited dreams.
Make the necessary changes that will give you the mileage you desire in life.
Be bold to make that move!
As you move, stick with what works and lighten yourself of the burden of the stuffs that don’t work.
Hold on to those that love you and keep becoming the best of yourself.
Position yourself in your place of relevance and your prominence will be inevitable.
Only then will you be able to attract true fans effortlessly.
Be the best of yourself, enjoy the comfort of your own skin, align with those that value you and quit pretending.
Take the bull by the horn and dare to play life’s game to the fullest!

Never let the fear of striking out

Playing The Game

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Never Pretend: Do The Best You Can

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I want to love

Find The One


It is my heart desire to see smiles on faces, because they encountered me.
I earnestly desire that my presence shall calm tensed nerves and help anxiety fade away.
I long to see burdens lifted up and solutions proffered, simply because I showed up.
I wish that no malice, jealousy, strife and similar vices will be able to survive my presence.
I love to have the right word for every moment.
I would like to carry hope along with me and to exude contagious joy everywhere I go.
I would love my arms to be a sure place of comfort and my presence, a place of rest.
I love to be associated with peace, joy and progress.
I want to love, and I want to be loved in return.

I want to love and be loved

Love And Be Loved

I want someone to put a smile on my face.
I want someone to calm my nerves when I’m tensed.
I want someone to share my burdens with me.
I want someone with whom I will enjoy perfect peace.
I want someone that will have the right word for me.
I want someone that would always ignite hope and joy in me.
I want to find the arms in which I will enjoy comfort and rest.
I want someone that desires my progress and happiness.
I want to love and be loved in return.

I want someone to long for my presence.
I want someone to long for my touch.
I want someone to long to hear my voice.
I want someone to long to be of help to me.

One day, I will find you.
I’ll love to stay around you.
And let it be soon.

Never leave me lonely
Dare to love me, only
I really want it soon.

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Confession: It is worth it, but I am Afraid

Confession: It is worth it, but I am Afraid

Fear or Success

Courage is What Truly Counts

Fear is one of the pillar roots of failure.
Other culprits are ignorance, laziness, misprioritization, lack of interest, indecision and peer pressure.
Fear is the subject for analysis in this post.
I have recently been sharing thoughts about taking responsibility and addressing escape escuses.
Here are some links to keep you updated.
“I am afraid” could be regarded as another escape excuse, but considering the sincerity and openness, I will take it to be a confession.
Fear is often the reason behind most excuses and the moment we identify it and face it, our chances for excellence skyrockets.
I want to give you this assurance that fear is not something new.
Fear is not peculiar to you.
Even great achievers have battled with fear.
This is just to let you know that you are not alone in this.
From your own words; “It is worth it, but I am afraid”, I can deduce that you have the desire to continue and I can also sense that there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Since you are convinced that it is worth it, your problems are very much reduced. If I were you, I would face my fears, dive in headlong and go for the grabs.
Fear can be paralysing, and that is why we must keep a clear head to analyse things objectively and move beyond being emotional to being rational.
When you have come to the conclusion that a venture is worth it, you are at peace with the terms and you desire the dividends, you already have sufficient motivation to overcome your fears.
Motivation can propel you to overcome;ignorance, laziness, misprioritization, lack of interest, indecision and peer pressure.
Fear is unique, because sometimes it defies common sense. It could be crippling and create an impression of hopelessness in situations. But no matter how devastating fear may appear to be, you can take charge of it right within your mind. Alter your thoughts, think of the brighter side, remind yourself of those that made it, repeat the procedure over and over again in your mind. Discuss with positively minded people. Take charge of the situation and say to yourself; “is it just this thing?
The magnitude you allote to it in your mind could be part of what intimidates you in the situation.
Figure out a way to forge ahead beyond your fears.
As long as you believe, you will overcome.
Once there is a will, there is a way.
Anything worth doing is worth doing well.
I once came across an acronym for fear that says fear is: False Evidences Appearing Real.

Don't be afraid


How will you feel if you are stopped by mirages and illusions?
How could you be deprived of your dreams, simply because you didn’t have the nerve to lift a finger when you should have?
How will you feel when you look back and see that there was no reason why you should not have succeeded only that you resigned out of fear?
What story will you have to tell when you need to give account of what you have achieved with your time?
Why should you even think of allowing fear to be the reason to have regrets?
Nip fear at the bud and move on.
Do it if it is worth it.

Fear of failure

Desire For Success

Everything you want is attainable, if only you can take the necessary steps.
Your chances of making a difference lie in doing things differently.
There is really a fear of change, but only change brings change.
You can’t keep doing the same thing and be expecting different results.
Gather the necessary courage to unleash the possibilities awaiting you behind you fears.

The other side of fear

Everything You Want

Identifying the fact that you are afraid and confessing it, is the first step to finding a solution.
Now that you know how much depends on the courage you choose to build, do that which must be done.
I would love you to share your story with smiles on your face and with a sense of fulfilment.
succumbing to your fears will only bring regrets later.
If truly it is worth it, then do it. Don’t let fear stop you.

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Confession: It Is Worth It, But I am Afraid.

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Giving Up

Escape Excuse

Is quitting the way out?
Success is not the absence of challenges, but the persistence that surmounts them.
Have you not read stories of people that made a difference?
Thomas Edison’s teachers said he was “too stupid to learn anything.” He was fired from his first two jobs for being “non-productive.” As an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Edison replied, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”
What do you mean when you say; “I tried”. Are you trying to say you’ve done all you know how to do? Are you saying you have given it sufficient time or put in the anticipated resources to get you the mileage you are targeting? Have you made consultations, explored variations, considered alternatives or attempted higher principles on the very same approach you have adopted? I believe that how hard you can try depends largely on you expectations and your level of interest.
I may not be able to influence your interest in this venture, but whether you succeed or fail at it is going to be solely dependent on your disposition towards it.
Whether you believe you can or you believe you can’t, you are right.
Very often, what we believe becomes our reality.
There are obviously times we are faced with situations where we have to make a choice whether to continue or whether to give up.
It is not strange to feel like you do right now, but how will you look at your decision today in a few years to come?
Will you be proud of your decision?

Escape Excuse; I tried

Decision; Try Harder

We fully well know that an unexamined life is not worth living and there is no examination without yardsticks for evaluation. How effectively have you evaluated your expectations, your contributions and the results you have received so far?
What projections have you made into the future? Will this pace of progress amount to something better, or will it end up in a dead end?
Am I getting the required encouragement and cooperation from team mates?
Is the problem really my level of interest or is this just something I’m not cut out for?
What questions have you asked yourself?
I know of a man who got fired from his job and he could boldly beat his hand on his chest and say; “I gave it my best”.
I was not surprised when this man was called back to resume work.
Are you playing your own part half-heartedly?
Are there other interests that are of priority to you?
Putting myself in your shoes, I would not quit. I would rather put in my very best.
But I am not you. The one who wears the shoe knows where it pinches.
The fact that you tried does not justify a quit.
The only justifiable reason for a quit is that you gave it your best and nothing got better.
Many people have turned back, just at the verge of a breakthrough.
I will never forget the story of a man who took up a contract to dig a borehole and would only get paid if he found water. He began drilling and inserting pipes at his own expense until he could no longer afford to continue, he just had the last pipe to insert and was already loosing hope in the possibility of reaching water. He pleaded with his client to give him some money to purchase pipes, but his client reminded him of the terms of their agreement: “No water, no money”.
The young man made up his mind to go and borrow pipes from his material supplier and give it a last try. On his way, he gave instructions to his foreman to drill further and insert the last available pipe. Still on his way to borrow more pipes, he got a call from his foreman; “I have reached water”.
This breakthrough not only fetched the young man a lot of money, it also earned him a huge reputation in the field of drilling boreholes and providing water in the oddest of areas.
I am not assuring you that you will set phenomenal records in this venture, but I am sure of such chances. I have made my evaluations and decided to keep at this and to give it my best. I know that your devoted contribution will increase our chances of making a difference in this field and because we will have sole ownership of the venture, we will decide what patents to sell and what patents to keep. We will decide whether to go public or incorporated. We decide what the share allotments will be and who partners with us or not.
I cannot see any better offer than this you already have. I see no justifiable reason why “I have tried” should be coming up at this early stage. There is still a lot to do. There are still lots of pieces to fix up if we must resolve this puzzle. We have figured out a lot, we have identified viable prospects, we have experienced our strengths, we know our threats and weaknesses. Our opportunities are countless. We can’t leave the birds we’ve got at hand to pursue the unknown.
It is often said that; “The devil we know is better than the angel we do not know”.
We know the in and out of this venture.
Together we can get the best out of it.
It is better to give it our best and fail, than to abandon it.
But I still have the assurance that we will not fail at this.
Give us this chance that we deserve, it will pay off.

I have tried my best

I tried

“I tried”

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Don't quit when tired

Be A Finisher

Don't Make Excuses

You Can Do It

“I am tired”.
Well, let me tell you; resting while racing is counter mount to failure.
Now that you are facing the reality of your predicament, you think that claiming tiredness is the way out?
I will advise you; rest when you finish.
Making excuses has never been a way out and will never be.
Don’t you have what it takes to do things right?
It is either you are in or you are not. You either give it your best or find something else.
You could genuinely be tired, but you don’t have to keep looking for the easy way out.
“Leave me alone”.
Let me still remind you; whatever you leave waits for you.
You have responsibilities and the best thing for you to do is to face them.
You have committed yourself, you must have to be strong and finish.
Of course, I am very much around, but that doesn’t mean I will take over your own responsibility to your detriment.
Has it not occurred to you that if you do things right, we can be more productive together?
Have you not noticed that you are better at some things, while I am better at some others?
If you leave it all for me with all these flimsy excuses, we won’t really emerge as the best.
We started this together, but you have always been looking in the direction of walking away.
Why won’t you be tired when you have your eyes outside?
A bird at hand is better than a thousand elsewhere.
Stick to your responsibility and increase our capacity. Grow our productivity and spread our relevance.
Your contribution counts. I will not leave you alone.
You may be tired, but remember I can get tired too.
You might be looking for alternatives, but remember that I could get a replacement for you.
You have the skill and you are good when you are in the mood, but attitude is everything.
A consisted person is always considered more reliable.
I may not always be interested in you, but my commitment to ensure that we reach our destination keeps me bound to you.
Better brazen up and stop being tired. If I lose my regard for you, you might not enjoy the process and you will end up being stuck in an endless loop or even worse; find yourself in a dead end.
Now that we have the attention of each other, do away with anything that will impede our progress.
What other excuses do you have up your sleeves?
What other escape strategy do you intend to generate?
If you give your best to productivity, you will not have time for frivolities.
The time you but into your escape strategies will generate you more results if you channel it to productivity.
“I am tired, leave me alone”. Oh no! That does not get us anywhere.
Bring back your heart to this. Put in your spirit, soul and body. Tackle it with all you’ve got. I promise you, you will not regret it.
The potentials we’ve got can fetch us much more than anything you see out there. We’ve got to maximize our potentials and that includes you and me.
If you could put up with our excesses for this long, why not finish.
You never might understand how much of your nuisance we have tolerated and your trash that we have swallowed for us to have progressed to this extent.
I’m sure you can see the destination, but I’m also sure that the process scares you.
We must go through it to the end, no matter how tiring it might be.
We can’t go looking for crumbs while we are right on the gold mine.
Don’t be tired, my dear. Be strong.
Let us give our best together, we’ll achieve much more.
Synergy works when we all contribute our various quotas.
I am with you in this; don’t turn your back on me.
Quit the excuses and stop trying to escape.
Put more effort into making it work than finding an alternative.
We have the controlling shares in this our own venture, but anywhere else, you’ll only be served of what is left.
If only you can see this through my eyes, you will give this the commitment that it deserves.

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Escape Excuse; I am tired.

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Escape excuse; It's not my fault

“It is not my fault”?
Is that what you have to say?
Whose fault is it then?
Things happened and you reacted. Was I the one who chose your reaction for you?
Things always happen that we don’t have control over, but after they have happened, how do we respond?
“You caused it”
Is that your defense?
Why can’t you damn the consequences and say; “I did it”.
Anybody can be hurt, anybody can lose a temper, anybody can cry or get depressed, but nobody should blame their reaction on either circumstances or someone else.
I must not respond to every comment made at me, I must not involve myself in every place where people call my name. I can choose to ignore a slap or apologize for even seemingly inconsequential things. The basic truth is that we respond according to our own interpretation or disposition towards things.
How can you believe that you have no fault, simply because you are the one always complaining?
Hasn’t it ever occurred to you that complaining is a problem of its own?
What gives you the right to get annoyed at me when I have never shown annoyance at you?
Why would you assume that the fact that I am never mad at you is because you never erred?
How could you be that insensitive?
Have you ever realized that you always consider yourself alone?
What have you ever thought about all of us who accommodate you and endure your excesses, with the hope that improvement takes a process?
I choose to maintain a cheerful disposition, because that is the way I like it, and not because you have been too wonderful.
I love to have you around me, not because you are perfect, but because I know that you have numerous potentials that can be developed.
How could you imagine that all the privileges you enjoy are of your own doing?
I wouldn’t deny learning a lot from you, but why can’t you even admit that you’ve been taught.
What concerns the solution to a problem with who caused it in the first place?
Why can’t you realize that this is not the time to apportion blames?
Is it in the middle of a battle that you begin to settle differences among yourselves?
Win the battle first, and then organize your house. Or retreat and take stock and be sure of where you stand.
Anybody can say “It’s not my fault”, but I wonder how far it can get anyone.
“You caused it” is an easy way out, but then isn’t resolving it a more beneficial path to tread?
We have a long way to go, and we must reach our destination.
The first thing you must learn in life’s journey is to take responsibility.
Blame will never help, neither will denial.
Take the bull by the horn and make the difference that is worth making.
Accommodate your colleagues and be both patient and considerate.
Life is not about you alone; try to look through other people’s eyes.
You are worth so much, but that shouldn’t make you proud.
Many who have surpassed you are humble and reserved.
Your standards may be high, but what truly keeps you is beyond that.
The way you dress may count, but character surpasses looks.
When you think it’s not your fault, you transfer the power to solve it to the one you blame.
When you claim that you are always right, you deprive yourself the privilege of learning anything new.
When you shut others out, you close the door to what they can offer.
Be wise, but be assured that life is not just all about you.
I won’t deny the fact that my choices affect you and your choices affect me, but we must tell ourselves the truth; we can control our reactions.
We need each other.
Even if it’s not your fault, what should now be done?
Even if I caused it, what’s the way forward?
Come out of that your shell and make things happen.
Look at the bright side of life and leave the past behind.
Change the things that are not right and take the steps that should be taken.
We are passionately going somewhere, and we will definitely get there.
Do away with; “it’s not my fault” and “you caused it”.
It is time to make a difference!
Take charge or keep being a victim.
Become responsible for anything that affects you, or at least, accept some degree of responsibility. That’s the only way to be part of determining your destination. If truly nothing is your fault, then you might just not be making any contribution.
Think your own thoughts, live your own life and take responsibility of things that affect you.
You definitely have a certain degree of control on your circumstances, don’t leave that privilege to others and to chance.
Do what you can, and own up when you fail.

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Escape Excuse; It Is Not My Fault

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Don't Deny

Take Responsibility

Denying Mistakes

Living A Lie

Are you now taking denial as your way of escape?
Are you giving up?
Are you trying to wipe away traces that you ever failed?
That’s being a chicken and I will not take that from you.
Time and again I pleaded with you to come back to me so that together we will make out something from what we had left. We had a team that was waxing strong and was only met with a temporary failure that could easily have been taken care of by team work and togetherness, but you chose to turn your back on us. I warned you that passing blames has never been a way out and can never be in this case, but you insisted that it was my entire fault. Again I pleaded to be heard, I begged for a chance to clarify doubts and take responsibility of the situation, but you shut the door against me. I cried out that every action had consequences and the option with the greatest votes is not necessarily the best one. I assured you that my reason for cancelling the operation midway was that the result may be devastating, but you insisted that it was the most popular opinion. I preferred to have a flopped operation than to lose an entire team, but you insisted that the team supported your opinion. I took my precautions and did the best thing I thought, which was to turn around regardless of how far we had gone on the wrong path. All my explanations fell on deaf ears and my suggestions were trashed.
Today, it has dawned on you that everything you do will always be associated with you and that the passed will always hunt you. Then you choose to dissolve the team and discard all that we have left? You prefer to wipe evidence of our existence rather than own up that you once failed. Do you think that you can really go far without making mistakes and taking responsibility of them? Do you really think that the new field you are trying to delve into will not have its own unique challenges?
Well, whatever you may have been thinking all these while is not my business. You have called, not to suggest, but to instruct that there was never a team. You insist that every acquired asset must be evacuated and every team member left to their fate. Can you go to that extent only to exonerate yourself? Will you do that to claim faultless and perfect so that you will brag about how spotless you are? Will you mount the podium and tell people not to do the very things you did to qualify to speak to them? Will you lie to be seen as a saint and trample on others to attain great heights? I will not take that nonsense. If you had called me as a friend to give you advice, I would have shown you all the loop holes in your plan and showed you how we could go higher together, but you chose to draw the sword.
I am a success today, because I never denied my failures. I have succeeded severally simply because I took responsibility of my mistakes. I am considered trustworthy, not because I never erred, but because I always owned up and faced my errors. Whose advantage is it if I claim that I never made a mistake? One who has never failed has never tried anything worthwhile. Did you learn to ride your bicycle without ever falling? Did you learn to swim without ever gulping water? What makes you think I will ever sacrifice my experience only for you to have an image that is not true? We still stand a chance of learning from our mistakes and making something out of what we have left, but you rather chose to live in denial and wipe out all traces. Sorry, that will never happen.
The tables have turned. My projections are beginning to manifest. The consequences of the little extent we went in error are beginning to hunt you. Instead of being grateful for how much damage I spared you, you try to intimidate me into scrapping this empire that we have painstakingly built. I am not the boy you have always thought I am. Now you must contend with me. You never wanted to hear me out, now I am the one to dictate the terms. You want to control people’s opinion about you by manipulating facts. I will never let that happen. What value will you have to project as a leader, when you attained your position by falsehood? What will you have to offer if all you’ve got are make beliefs? What will be your message when your whole life has been a mess? What will you have to preach when you commit the same offences that you were nominated to contend? I see your move as that of a coward. What makes you think that either I or any member of my team will ever regard you, when we know your pranks?
I will not take this for granted. I will not let this pass. I must discover all that you have hidden in the past and expose them. I will pass you through every verification exercise, before I ever accept anything you say. I will confront your very fears and set you free from this life of denial. Wiping away traces never erases the fact that things happened. If you are scared that your sins will hunt you, then face them now. If you have to go through any remedial process, I will ensure that you do so. Don’t forget that we’ve been friends. Don’t forget that I am still willing to have you back and make things right. Don’t forget that it went sour because of you in the first place. Don’t forget that I know all your allies and hideouts. Don’t forget that I know your habits and your hobbies. Don’t think that my silence has been cowardice, or my inactivity ignorance.
Don’t think I have any ill intensions towards you. Don’t even think that my mission has anything to do with revenge. I will not take advantage of you now that you need me, I will only make sure that I purge you of all your vices. I will not use your mistakes against you, I will rather use them to teach you the very lessons you have been evading. You lost your chance for a deliberation when you chose to impose your opinion on our team. I am forced to go about it my own way. It may hurt us really bad, but it is better to endure temporary pain to enjoy permanent pleasure. I will not join you to be a chicken. I will invite you to hear you out. I will give you every chance to express yourself, notwithstanding that you denied me such privilege. I will let you pour out your heart and I will pour out mine afterwards. But if you turn down my offer, you will be forced to dance to the tune of my music.
Why on earth will anyone chose a life of denial? Why can’t you face your fears and standup to your mistakes. Why are you bent on taking an easy way out? Why will you resign and claim that you never attempted? Why will you place your hands on the plough and look back?
I will stand by you to ensure that you don’t escape with any of these vices left in you. I will be there for you until you are refined. I will be committed to ensuring that due process takes its course. I will never let you out of my sight until you are pure. Then will I open my arms to you again. Then will I reassure you that you are still the one that can bring out the best in me. Turning your back on me only made me stronger and wiser. I will never turn my back on you, but will ensure that you always take responsibility of your actions. Our team is a formidable one and I will not let our experience waste away. We still need you, but we need you sane. Take my offer and accept my proposal. Don’t turn down my invitation because that might be your only chance to let us do this together as friends. If you insist on sticking to your adamant idiosyncrasies, I will be left with no other option than to bend your hand. I am determined to set you right even if it must take a war. Put back your sword to its sheaves or I will draw mine. My assurance to you is that we will finish together that which we started together. Whatever goes up must surely come down and what goes around comes around. I will be waiting for you because there is no option of resigning. You will not face your new predicament alone. Together we can turn it to be a beauty to behold. My hand is stretched out; take responsibility and stick to your commitment to align with me. If you were once passionate about our team then you can always become passionate again.
Don’t Resign: Take Responsibility

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Take Responsibility: Are You Resigning?

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