Giving Up

Escape Excuse

Is quitting the way out?
Success is not the absence of challenges, but the persistence that surmounts them.
Have you not read stories of people that made a difference?

Thomas Edison’s teachers said he was “too stupid to learn anything.” He was fired from his first two jobs for being “non-productive.” As an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Edison replied, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”
What do you mean when you say; “I tried”. Are you trying to say you’ve done all you know how to do? Are you saying you have given it sufficient time or put in the anticipated resources to get you the mileage you are targeting? Have you made consultations, explored variations, considered alternatives or attempted higher principles on the very same approach you have adopted? I believe that how hard you can try depends largely on you expectations and your level of interest.
I may not be able to influence your interest in this venture, but whether you succeed or fail at it is going to be solely dependent on your disposition towards it.
Whether you believe you can or you believe you can’t, you are right.
Very often, what we believe becomes our reality.
There are obviously times we are faced with situations where we have to make a choice whether to continue or whether to give up.
It is not strange to feel like you do right now, but how will you look at your decision today in a few years to come?
Will you be proud of your decision?

Escape Excuse; I tried

Decision; Try Harder

We fully well know that an unexamined life is not worth living and there is no examination without yardsticks for evaluation. How effectively have you evaluated your expectations, your contributions and the results you have received so far?
What projections have you made into the future? Will this pace of progress amount to something better, or will it end up in a dead end?
Am I getting the required encouragement and cooperation from team mates?
Is the problem really my level of interest or is this just something I’m not cut out for?
What questions have you asked yourself?
I know of a man who got fired from his job and he could boldly beat his hand on his chest and say; “I gave it my best”.
I was not surprised when this man was called back to resume work.
Are you playing your own part half-heartedly?
Are there other interests that are of priority to you?
Putting myself in your shoes, I would not quit. I would rather put in my very best.
But I am not you. The one who wears the shoe knows where it pinches.
The fact that you tried does not justify a quit.
The only justifiable reason for a quit is that you gave it your best and nothing got better.
Many people have turned back, just at the verge of a breakthrough.
I will never forget the story of a man who took up a contract to dig a borehole and would only get paid if he found water. He began drilling and inserting pipes at his own expense until he could no longer afford to continue, he just had the last pipe to insert and was already loosing hope in the possibility of reaching water. He pleaded with his client to give him some money to purchase pipes, but his client reminded him of the terms of their agreement: “No water, no money”.
The young man made up his mind to go and borrow pipes from his material supplier and give it a last try. On his way, he gave instructions to his foreman to drill further and insert the last available pipe. Still on his way to borrow more pipes, he got a call from his foreman; “I have reached water”.
This breakthrough not only fetched the young man a lot of money, it also earned him a huge reputation in the field of drilling boreholes and providing water in the oddest of areas.
I am not assuring you that you will set phenomenal records in this venture, but I am sure of such chances. I have made my evaluations and decided to keep at this and to give it my best. I know that your devoted contribution will increase our chances of making a difference in this field and because we will have sole ownership of the venture, we will decide what patents to sell and what patents to keep. We will decide whether to go public or incorporated. We decide what the share allotments will be and who partners with us or not.
I cannot see any better offer than this you already have. I see no justifiable reason why “I have tried” should be coming up at this early stage. There is still a lot to do. There are still lots of pieces to fix up if we must resolve this puzzle. We have figured out a lot, we have identified viable prospects, we have experienced our strengths, we know our threats and weaknesses. Our opportunities are countless. We can’t leave the birds we’ve got at hand to pursue the unknown.
It is often said that; “The devil we know is better than the angel we do not know”.
We know the in and out of this venture.
Together we can get the best out of it.
It is better to give it our best and fail, than to abandon it.
But I still have the assurance that we will not fail at this.
Give us this chance that we deserve, it will pay off.

I have tried my best

I tried

“I tried”

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Don't quit when tired

Be A Finisher

Don't Make Excuses

You Can Do It

“I am tired”.
Well, let me tell you; resting while racing is counter mount to failure.
Now that you are facing the reality of your predicament, you think that claiming tiredness is the way out?
I will advise you; rest when you finish.
Making excuses has never been a way out and will never be.
Don’t you have what it takes to do things right?
It is either you are in or you are not. You either give it your best or find something else.
You could genuinely be tired, but you don’t have to keep looking for the easy way out.
“Leave me alone”.
Let me still remind you; whatever you leave waits for you.
You have responsibilities and the best thing for you to do is to face them.
You have committed yourself, you must have to be strong and finish.
Of course, I am very much around, but that doesn’t mean I will take over your own responsibility to your detriment.
Has it not occurred to you that if you do things right, we can be more productive together?
Have you not noticed that you are better at some things, while I am better at some others?
If you leave it all for me with all these flimsy excuses, we won’t really emerge as the best.
We started this together, but you have always been looking in the direction of walking away.
Why won’t you be tired when you have your eyes outside?
A bird at hand is better than a thousand elsewhere.
Stick to your responsibility and increase our capacity. Grow our productivity and spread our relevance.
Your contribution counts. I will not leave you alone.
You may be tired, but remember I can get tired too.
You might be looking for alternatives, but remember that I could get a replacement for you.
You have the skill and you are good when you are in the mood, but attitude is everything.
A consisted person is always considered more reliable.
I may not always be interested in you, but my commitment to ensure that we reach our destination keeps me bound to you.
Better brazen up and stop being tired. If I lose my regard for you, you might not enjoy the process and you will end up being stuck in an endless loop or even worse; find yourself in a dead end.
Now that we have the attention of each other, do away with anything that will impede our progress.
What other excuses do you have up your sleeves?
What other escape strategy do you intend to generate?
If you give your best to productivity, you will not have time for frivolities.
The time you but into your escape strategies will generate you more results if you channel it to productivity.
“I am tired, leave me alone”. Oh no! That does not get us anywhere.
Bring back your heart to this. Put in your spirit, soul and body. Tackle it with all you’ve got. I promise you, you will not regret it.
The potentials we’ve got can fetch us much more than anything you see out there. We’ve got to maximize our potentials and that includes you and me.
If you could put up with our excesses for this long, why not finish.
You never might understand how much of your nuisance we have tolerated and your trash that we have swallowed for us to have progressed to this extent.
I’m sure you can see the destination, but I’m also sure that the process scares you.
We must go through it to the end, no matter how tiring it might be.
We can’t go looking for crumbs while we are right on the gold mine.
Don’t be tired, my dear. Be strong.
Let us give our best together, we’ll achieve much more.
Synergy works when we all contribute our various quotas.
I am with you in this; don’t turn your back on me.
Quit the excuses and stop trying to escape.
Put more effort into making it work than finding an alternative.
We have the controlling shares in this our own venture, but anywhere else, you’ll only be served of what is left.
If only you can see this through my eyes, you will give this the commitment that it deserves.

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Escape Excuse; I am tired.

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Escape excuse; It's not my fault

“It is not my fault”?
Is that what you have to say?
Whose fault is it then?
Things happened and you reacted. Was I the one who chose your reaction for you?
Things always happen that we don’t have control over, but after they have happened, how do we respond?
“You caused it”
Is that your defense?
Why can’t you damn the consequences and say; “I did it”.
Anybody can be hurt, anybody can lose a temper, anybody can cry or get depressed, but nobody should blame their reaction on either circumstances or someone else.
I must not respond to every comment made at me, I must not involve myself in every place where people call my name. I can choose to ignore a slap or apologize for even seemingly inconsequential things. The basic truth is that we respond according to our own interpretation or disposition towards things.
How can you believe that you have no fault, simply because you are the one always complaining?
Hasn’t it ever occurred to you that complaining is a problem of its own?
What gives you the right to get annoyed at me when I have never shown annoyance at you?
Why would you assume that the fact that I am never mad at you is because you never erred?
How could you be that insensitive?
Have you ever realized that you always consider yourself alone?
What have you ever thought about all of us who accommodate you and endure your excesses, with the hope that improvement takes a process?
I choose to maintain a cheerful disposition, because that is the way I like it, and not because you have been too wonderful.
I love to have you around me, not because you are perfect, but because I know that you have numerous potentials that can be developed.
How could you imagine that all the privileges you enjoy are of your own doing?
I wouldn’t deny learning a lot from you, but why can’t you even admit that you’ve been taught.
What concerns the solution to a problem with who caused it in the first place?
Why can’t you realize that this is not the time to apportion blames?
Is it in the middle of a battle that you begin to settle differences among yourselves?
Win the battle first, and then organize your house. Or retreat and take stock and be sure of where you stand.
Anybody can say “It’s not my fault”, but I wonder how far it can get anyone.
“You caused it” is an easy way out, but then isn’t resolving it a more beneficial path to tread?
We have a long way to go, and we must reach our destination.
The first thing you must learn in life’s journey is to take responsibility.
Blame will never help, neither will denial.
Take the bull by the horn and make the difference that is worth making.
Accommodate your colleagues and be both patient and considerate.
Life is not about you alone; try to look through other people’s eyes.
You are worth so much, but that shouldn’t make you proud.
Many who have surpassed you are humble and reserved.
Your standards may be high, but what truly keeps you is beyond that.
The way you dress may count, but character surpasses looks.
When you think it’s not your fault, you transfer the power to solve it to the one you blame.
When you claim that you are always right, you deprive yourself the privilege of learning anything new.
When you shut others out, you close the door to what they can offer.
Be wise, but be assured that life is not just all about you.
I won’t deny the fact that my choices affect you and your choices affect me, but we must tell ourselves the truth; we can control our reactions.
We need each other.
Even if it’s not your fault, what should now be done?
Even if I caused it, what’s the way forward?
Come out of that your shell and make things happen.
Look at the bright side of life and leave the past behind.
Change the things that are not right and take the steps that should be taken.
We are passionately going somewhere, and we will definitely get there.
Do away with; “it’s not my fault” and “you caused it”.
It is time to make a difference!
Take charge or keep being a victim.
Become responsible for anything that affects you, or at least, accept some degree of responsibility. That’s the only way to be part of determining your destination. If truly nothing is your fault, then you might just not be making any contribution.
Think your own thoughts, live your own life and take responsibility of things that affect you.
You definitely have a certain degree of control on your circumstances, don’t leave that privilege to others and to chance.
Do what you can, and own up when you fail.

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Escape Excuse; It Is Not My Fault

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Don't Deny

Take Responsibility

Denying Mistakes

Living A Lie

Are you now taking denial as your way of escape?
Are you giving up?
Are you trying to wipe away traces that you ever failed?
That’s being a chicken and I will not take that from you.
Time and again I pleaded with you to come back to me so that together we will make out something from what we had left. We had a team that was waxing strong and was only met with a temporary failure that could easily have been taken care of by team work and togetherness, but you chose to turn your back on us. I warned you that passing blames has never been a way out and can never be in this case, but you insisted that it was my entire fault. Again I pleaded to be heard, I begged for a chance to clarify doubts and take responsibility of the situation, but you shut the door against me. I cried out that every action had consequences and the option with the greatest votes is not necessarily the best one. I assured you that my reason for cancelling the operation midway was that the result may be devastating, but you insisted that it was the most popular opinion. I preferred to have a flopped operation than to lose an entire team, but you insisted that the team supported your opinion. I took my precautions and did the best thing I thought, which was to turn around regardless of how far we had gone on the wrong path. All my explanations fell on deaf ears and my suggestions were trashed.
Today, it has dawned on you that everything you do will always be associated with you and that the passed will always hunt you. Then you choose to dissolve the team and discard all that we have left? You prefer to wipe evidence of our existence rather than own up that you once failed. Do you think that you can really go far without making mistakes and taking responsibility of them? Do you really think that the new field you are trying to delve into will not have its own unique challenges?
Well, whatever you may have been thinking all these while is not my business. You have called, not to suggest, but to instruct that there was never a team. You insist that every acquired asset must be evacuated and every team member left to their fate. Can you go to that extent only to exonerate yourself? Will you do that to claim faultless and perfect so that you will brag about how spotless you are? Will you mount the podium and tell people not to do the very things you did to qualify to speak to them? Will you lie to be seen as a saint and trample on others to attain great heights? I will not take that nonsense. If you had called me as a friend to give you advice, I would have shown you all the loop holes in your plan and showed you how we could go higher together, but you chose to draw the sword.
I am a success today, because I never denied my failures. I have succeeded severally simply because I took responsibility of my mistakes. I am considered trustworthy, not because I never erred, but because I always owned up and faced my errors. Whose advantage is it if I claim that I never made a mistake? One who has never failed has never tried anything worthwhile. Did you learn to ride your bicycle without ever falling? Did you learn to swim without ever gulping water? What makes you think I will ever sacrifice my experience only for you to have an image that is not true? We still stand a chance of learning from our mistakes and making something out of what we have left, but you rather chose to live in denial and wipe out all traces. Sorry, that will never happen.
The tables have turned. My projections are beginning to manifest. The consequences of the little extent we went in error are beginning to hunt you. Instead of being grateful for how much damage I spared you, you try to intimidate me into scrapping this empire that we have painstakingly built. I am not the boy you have always thought I am. Now you must contend with me. You never wanted to hear me out, now I am the one to dictate the terms. You want to control people’s opinion about you by manipulating facts. I will never let that happen. What value will you have to project as a leader, when you attained your position by falsehood? What will you have to offer if all you’ve got are make beliefs? What will be your message when your whole life has been a mess? What will you have to preach when you commit the same offences that you were nominated to contend? I see your move as that of a coward. What makes you think that either I or any member of my team will ever regard you, when we know your pranks?
I will not take this for granted. I will not let this pass. I must discover all that you have hidden in the past and expose them. I will pass you through every verification exercise, before I ever accept anything you say. I will confront your very fears and set you free from this life of denial. Wiping away traces never erases the fact that things happened. If you are scared that your sins will hunt you, then face them now. If you have to go through any remedial process, I will ensure that you do so. Don’t forget that we’ve been friends. Don’t forget that I am still willing to have you back and make things right. Don’t forget that it went sour because of you in the first place. Don’t forget that I know all your allies and hideouts. Don’t forget that I know your habits and your hobbies. Don’t think that my silence has been cowardice, or my inactivity ignorance.
Don’t think I have any ill intensions towards you. Don’t even think that my mission has anything to do with revenge. I will not take advantage of you now that you need me, I will only make sure that I purge you of all your vices. I will not use your mistakes against you, I will rather use them to teach you the very lessons you have been evading. You lost your chance for a deliberation when you chose to impose your opinion on our team. I am forced to go about it my own way. It may hurt us really bad, but it is better to endure temporary pain to enjoy permanent pleasure. I will not join you to be a chicken. I will invite you to hear you out. I will give you every chance to express yourself, notwithstanding that you denied me such privilege. I will let you pour out your heart and I will pour out mine afterwards. But if you turn down my offer, you will be forced to dance to the tune of my music.
Why on earth will anyone chose a life of denial? Why can’t you face your fears and standup to your mistakes. Why are you bent on taking an easy way out? Why will you resign and claim that you never attempted? Why will you place your hands on the plough and look back?
I will stand by you to ensure that you don’t escape with any of these vices left in you. I will be there for you until you are refined. I will be committed to ensuring that due process takes its course. I will never let you out of my sight until you are pure. Then will I open my arms to you again. Then will I reassure you that you are still the one that can bring out the best in me. Turning your back on me only made me stronger and wiser. I will never turn my back on you, but will ensure that you always take responsibility of your actions. Our team is a formidable one and I will not let our experience waste away. We still need you, but we need you sane. Take my offer and accept my proposal. Don’t turn down my invitation because that might be your only chance to let us do this together as friends. If you insist on sticking to your adamant idiosyncrasies, I will be left with no other option than to bend your hand. I am determined to set you right even if it must take a war. Put back your sword to its sheaves or I will draw mine. My assurance to you is that we will finish together that which we started together. Whatever goes up must surely come down and what goes around comes around. I will be waiting for you because there is no option of resigning. You will not face your new predicament alone. Together we can turn it to be a beauty to behold. My hand is stretched out; take responsibility and stick to your commitment to align with me. If you were once passionate about our team then you can always become passionate again.
Don’t Resign: Take Responsibility

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Take Responsibility: Are You Resigning?

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Pushed To The Wall: The Good Side

Pushed to the wall

Pushed To the Wall: The Good Side

Being pushed to the wall either breaks you or makes you.
Sometimes, we are left with two options when pushed to the wall: to quit or to do what must be done.
Quitting is simply yielding to the pressure and giving up on the possibilities of a remedy.
Doing what must be done, on the other hand, entails thinking out of the box and a willingness to go the extra mile.
If you’ve been doubted; prove yourself.
If you’ve been neglected; become prominent.
If you’ve been rejected; move ahead.
The moment you prove your point, your relevance becomes glaring.
Proving your point requires bold actions and results; it does not come by winning arguments with words.
You can wine and cry, for all I care, but you can make much impact by trying to get pitied.
A winner does not become a winner because there were negligible challenges; he actually is a winner when he musters the courage and the actions that surmount any obstacles.
Pressure pushes you to the wall, then the stuff you are made of spills out.
On the inside, we may have both faith and fear. When fear prevails, quitting seems like the way out. But when faith prevails, there is always a way out.
Once there is a will, there is a way.

I’ve been pressed to the wall, but rather than quit, I’ll buckle up.
Instead of being side lined, I will take the Centre stage.
I may have acclimatized so much to the status quo that I had become over dependent and lost initiative, creativity and probably confidence.
Must I get an approval before I present what I’ve got? Should I reduce productivity because I never got applauded?
Do I have to wait for an endorsement before I am convinced that my services are outstanding?
I’ve got my own ideals and everyone has got a paradigm. I can’t be restricted to a particular pattern or only a single person’s thoughts.
You’ve got a head and so do I.
You may be the boss, but I can be my own boss.
You can reject me, but there are still a thousand and one people out there who will gladly receive me.
I chose you among numerous alternatives and you are still my preference. You may be undecided about me right now, but the stuff I am made of will soon spill out.
I may be begging you for collaboration at the moment, but when I have made my point, it may be you who will come begging.
I won’t leave you for another; neither will I let you go.
My mind is made up and even if you’ve lost taste, you will have no alternative, but to realize that I am worth much more than your estimation of my capabilities.
I won’t talk anymore because my results will speak for themselves.
Don’t think you have shut me out, You have only opened my eyes to the numerous opportunities that lurk around.
Your door will surely open one day, or you’ll peep out your window and see that the stone you once rejected has become the chief corner stone.
You won’t be able to resist me, but would I still have interest in you?
The same pressure you have used to break many is becoming the reason for my metamorphosis.
I can’t permit fear to prevail; I have made my choice to have faith.
Things can only get better, never worse. I always amazed you, when we first met. You think I’ve lost touch or become too old? I may have only conformed to your standards and stuck to your patterns. But the moment has come when the tables must turn.
You regarded me so highly and placed me in high esteem. It doesn’t matter where you’ve placed me now, but you have no option but to reawaken that first love.
I won’t let you out of my sight; neither will I let you lose sight of me.
You will watch me flourish and stir at me in awe.
My hand is still stretched out; grab it now while you can.
Soon I’ll stir the rudder and you will realize your mistake.
You are sailing in my own ship and you think you call the shots.
The only reason you are still in is that I chose to let you stay.
All that you seek out there are hidden right in me. Now that you have pushed so hard, you’ve spilled some part of me.
Pushing me to the wall is giving me a leap and pressing me beyond my walls has left me with no bounds.
The field is free and fair, but you are playing my own game.
You think you know the rules, but the rules of the game are mine.
How on earth would I have known without being pushed to the wall?
Don’t think your pressure breaks all; it has only made me strong.
Now you’ve seen the good side of being pushed to the wall.

What’s on your mind now?
This same story can be yours.

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Pushed to the wall: The good side.
The good things of life come disguised; I pray you’ll recognize them.
Always let the sleeping dogs lie.
“Onye akpana nwa agu aka n’odu, ma o di ndu, ma o nwuru anwu”. That’s the Igbo way of saying: Never touch the tail of a cub, whether dead or alive.
I don’t know what you’ve made out of this, but be rest assured that your case is not unique to you.
Only the one wearing the shoe knows where it pinches.
Be strong in your circumstances: you too will find a way out.
Being pushed to the wall also has its good side (Smiles). Find your own good side.
I rest my case.

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A Plea To Be Heard

Hear me out


How sad it feels to be deprived of the chance to express oneself.
How disturbing it could be to watch someone draw a conclusion about you that is not true.
We may make mistakes,
Facts may have created appearances,
But the truth remains the truth.
I may have failed a couple of math examinations, but that didn’t stop me from making a distinction when it mattered most.
I may have stepped into certain environments as the least qualified, but it never stopped me from distinguishing myself with excellence.
It hurts to have a lot to share, but to be shunned or intimidated into silence, and worse off, to be tagged something that you are not.
The fact that I may have refused to do something out of justifiable fear, does not mean that I cannot do it.
The fact that I stop certain operations as a precautionary measure does not make me incapable of leading a team.
It is good to be daring, but beyond a certain point, it becomes stupidity.
Why would I lead a team beyond the limits of safety?
Why incur costs and loss that could simply be avoided by caution.
Why conclude that I am incapable, when you would have suffered severely if I tried to please the crowd?
Who wouldn’t get tensed when there is pressure from everyone else to ignore the stipulated codes and sacrifice safety for excitement?
I may have initiated the operations hastily and nobody may have objected, but that wouldn’t stop me from choosing reason over popular opinion.
In a state of intense tension, retreating is more rational than another hasty alternative. After all, prevention is better than cure.
Will alienating me from the team prevent similar situations from coming up in future?
Will decamping to another team alienate occasional challenges?
Experience accumulates in working together as a team.
Why seek relief outside, at the expense of all that we have painstakingly built together?
Why shut me out and keep me in the dark?
Put yourself in my shoes; aren’t we psychological beings?
Can’t you get nervous out of tension or be momentarily faced with indecision?
Can’t you jump off in fright or be paralyzed with shock?
If machines can malfunction, why will a man’s inexperience be the reason to label him incapable?
Which manager did not pass through a process?
It is better that we grow together than giving away all that we have labored for to hire an expert to come and take all the glory.
I accept my mistake, please don’t bench me.
I am sincerely sorry, please forgive me.
I only need a chance to express myself to you, please don’t shut me out.
If really we are in this together, don’t leave me out here all alone.
Without either of us, there is no team, and without you, I can’t be my best.
Come back and together we can convince the rest.
Give me this chance to express myself and we can be on our feet again.
A couple of fails does not make me a failure.
It is still you who can bring out the best in me.
Don’t leave your doors shut against me.
Please hear me out!

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
A Plea To Be Heard.

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Unity and Understanding; Keys to Collaboration

Uniformity is sameness.
Unity is oneness.
I would always prefer oneness to sameness,
because if there were only pegs without holes,
there would be nothing to complement the other.
The body is made up of various parts,
so is a system made up of various components.
According to design, each of us are unique, so that we can collaborate with others to achieve our various purposes.
We don’t all have to be the same, but we can work together.
No matter how different we are, we can be one.
Unity thrives on love and understanding, uniformity thrives on conformity to patterns.
I would rather love and understand you than become you.
You don’t have to discard me, if I don’t look or act like you.
Find the square hole for the square peg and you’ll see how beautiful life can be.
There can’t be collaboration without unity and there can’t be unity without understanding.
We’ve got to understand each other, and that’s why we must give room to hear what the other has to say.
It’s not right to draw conclusions based on assumptions.
You can’t just think I’m wrong because that’s what it seems like.
You shouldn’t just shut me off because I didn’t act like you.
You’ll definitely need me when the time comes for my kind of things to be done.
Hold on to me, now that you can, so that when you need me, I would be easy to reach.
When we understand each other, we can collaborate.
Understanding begets unity and unity begets collaboration.
Unity and understanding are simply the keys to collaboration.
You don’t have to mistake uniformity for unity; they are not the same.
Remember where we started from?
Uniformity is sameness.
Unity is oneness.
We can’t all be the same:
Let’s be one!

Nnamonu Tochukwu.
Unity and Understanding; Keys to Collaboration

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